9 Discipline Alternative Methods

"Stop fighting." 

"Come here!" 

"Sit down!" 

"Leave your sister alone." 

"Give it back!" 

"No!" 

"Stay away from the door." 

"Calm down!" 

These quotes were  all said within a five-minute time frame.  It's been one of those days when you're obviously fussing at the wall because the kids are not listening.  While I do discipline, I tend to turn to alternatives on days like this.  Because when they keep at it, discipline is not doing the trick.  Discipline alternative methods give them some grace and me some peace.  So everybody wins!  The ones that work best for us are based on the concept of redirection.  

1. Play with The Kids - When I'm on the floor with them they don't fight or fuss; We simply eat our pretend cake & drink our fake juice out of a toy pepper shaker.  This is my go-to because it usually works so well. 

2. Enlist Little Helpers- Sometimes there's too much for me to do around the house.  So instead of playing with them, they help me.  My kids absolutely suck at helping; it drives me up the wall.  They put the clothes in the dryer way too slowly, and the table they wiped off usually isn't too clean.  But it gives them a great sense of accomplishment, and they stay out of trouble.  So it's totally worth it! 

3. Give Them Work- Whether it's a craft project, food to make, or just a coloring sheet. Give them something to do on their naughty days.  They'll be more focused on coloring Elmo's head purple instead of the walls. The more my kids have to do, the better they behave.  

4. Bathe Them- My kids love taking baths.  It seems to have some magical effect on them.  They're still wild and crazy when the bath is over, but they listen better.  And the bath gives me a small break to gather my thoughts.

5. Go Outside (Or Somewhere Else)- Let them run, climb, dance, jump, and play all those negative behaviors away.  In general, there are usually fewer rules outside; so there's less of a chance that they'll get in trouble.  And everyone gets some fresh air.

6. Go For a Ride To Nowhere- This is cheating. But my mother-in-law used to drive my youngest around the neighborhood sometimes because that was what calmed him down from his tantrums when I wasn't around.  I figured if it fixed his tantrums, it may fix his bad behavior too.  It does.  And I can get errands done.  If you don't have a car or don't want to drive, you can walk them around the neighborhood.

7.Read a Story/ Vice Versa- I usually begin reading to the boys. But because they're in a mood, they end up not listening.  So I convince them to read to me.  They love it! They get to make up stories and use up all their imagination.  I'll usually cut them off in the middle of their story and promise them that they can read to me later on if they behave.  This bites me in the butt at bedtime when I have to listen to them read for 30 minutes, but they do behave so that they can tell their own bedtime stories. It's a trick that has not failed for them

8. Have a Secret Weapon- Also cheating, but my weapon is a favorite movie.  Every few weeks or so when I've had it and all my options are exhausted, I will pull out The Lion King.  It's their favorite movie of all time, and I do not let them watch it often. So it keeps its undeniable appeal to them every time I play it. And I can just be a lazy parent for the next 1.5 hour or however long I play it.  A secret weapon is anything they love!

9. Talk!- Talking to kids is very effective.  Use short sentences and small words.  Get straight to the point, and they get it! They understand; they respond. They're smarter than we give them credit for. 

To avoid more time-outs, I got on the floor and played with my boys for an hour today, and then let them read to me while I folded laundry.  We then had a nice talk afterward, just to make sure we were all clear.  I can hear them rowdy-ing up again, but it's almost bedtime.  We made it over 6 hours with no need for discipline...That's pretty good.